Morning Lord. I’ve woken up early (as you know) so thought I would start as I mean to begin – with you. Sorry about yesterday. The whole day was a bit of a write-off. It’s funny how one little thing – like not being able to sleep overnight on Friday night – can have consequences that last all day. I was awake for hours, then finally fell back asleep at about six o’clock in the morning, then slept in badly. It was all down hill after that, especially since Andrew spent most of the day with Cameron.
I couldn’t sleep because I was running over my head (again) the whole conversation I’d had with Emily’s teacher about Emily’s behaviour both in class and out of it, especially in relation to Madison. Miss Rodgers described a child I’ve never met before, one who is wilful, disobedient, rude, uncaring, unfeeling and generally unpleasant. Madison, on the other hand, is a Poor Unfortunate who needs to be nurtured, comforted, coddled and protected. When I pointed out that we have Jess and Madison nurtured, comforted and coddled under the protection of our very roof, and the difficulty therein of making things work, I was informed by the elderly spinstery Miss Rodgers that my parenting needed work. What a cheek! I never thought I’d say this, but bring back Miss Hollis (Educational Goddess). At least she had some compassion and understanding.
And then I was awake thinking about Cameron’s brother. I didn’t know him but the whole situation seems very sad, Lord. Apparently (as you know) Bryce was staying in some sort of half-way house, the sort of place that provides sheltered accommodation to people who can’t seem to manage living a life of responsibility. According to the manager they have pretty strict rules, some of which Bryce struggled to abide by, and in consequence he came and went a great deal. It seems as though the staff genuinely wanted to help Bryce, but that Bryce hadn’t reached the point where he wanted the help enough to accept it.
However, he was at the half-way house when he died which, according to Police, makes things much simpler than if he had died on the streets. For a start he was easy to identify, his movements were easily accounted for, and he died overnight in his bed which would appear to rule out foul play. The attending physician suspects it was actually a heart attack that killed him, brought on by years of abusing his body with all manner of chemicals, but the pathologist’s report won’t be out until Monday so that everyone can know for sure. The funeral is being planned on Tuesday on the basis of this outcome.
Meanwhile, in case Andrew felt as though he got the short end of the stick yesterday, things were no picnic here. Jess seemed very depressed and didn’t appear to be paying much attention to anything, including Madison, and as a result Madison was bored and sulky. She parried this boredom and sulkiness like a sword, constantly prodding both of my children with it in an attempt to elicit a reaction out of someone. Of course this worked a treat and Emily not only rose to the bait, she drew out a sword of her own. Truly I have never seen her so riled up. Her voice went up about ten octaves as she shouted for Madison to get out of her room and leave her alone. This was followed by a shocking display of bad temper, but if nothing else it did show me that Emily’s behaviour is not entirely without provocation, and that while Madison might look as if butter wouldn’t melt in her mouth, she does contribute in a large way to the outcome for Emily.
The whole thing is what to do about it. With Jess so depressed and broke I can hardly ask the two of them to leave. All I can do is pray for some way of escape (and quick) together with a request for some encouragement at church this morning. I pray you would bless our time together as a family there this morning. Better go…the kids are up and I need to be there to play referee…Amen